Wedding Etiquette- For Guests
I've been to a lot of weddings, and although a lot of traditional etiquette is slowly being overturned, there are still a few points of common decency that need to be upheld, and some new factors to deal with that need their very own set of rules.
Consider this your how-to guide for being a gracious guest, and save yourself a lot of pain or embarrassment later!
#1- RSVPs are included with your invitation for a reason. Guest counts are needed for a lot of reasons, so if you don't bother to respond, don't expect there to be a chair, a meal, or a favour for you!
#2- If you RSVP, then actually show up (if at all possible). The couple was so happy to hear you could make it, and they have given the caterer the final head count. Which means, they've paid for your meal, please do your part and show up for the celebration!
#3- Don't bring a +1, unless your invitation says so. No further explanation needed, just don't do it!
#4- Don't wear white! This is an old point of etiquette, but not one that has gone away.
#5- Do not ruin what could be a great shot by the photographer by standing in the middle of the isle with your smart phone. The happy couple do not want a picture of the back of your head.
#6- Better yet, turn off your phone altogether! Be in the moment! Not only does this avoid ruining the photos they are actually paying for, it also avoids someone's phone playing the Star Wars theme song in the middle of the vows because Uncle Bob forgot to turn his ringer off.
#7- If you absolutely must take photos, don't rush to post them on Social Media. I'm a firm believer that the bride and groom should be the ones to choose what photo of their wedding day the world sees first. At the very least, if you happen to see the bride beforehand, do not- I repeat do not- post a photo of her on Facebook before the wedding has happened!
#8- Don't be late. There is nothing worse than someone walking down the isle just before the processional begins!
#9- Don't change the seating plan because you want to chat with so-and-so. They placed you in that seat for a reason, perhaps even gave the caterer the floor plan so they know what to serve where, don't mess it up.
#10- Above all, honour the wishes of the happy couple, no matter how you feel about those wishes. It's their day, and they invited you to be a part of it. If they're having an unplugged ceremony, unplug. If they ask for no children at their wedding, don't bring sweet Susie. You get the idea.
Be respectful, be happy, and enjoy the wedding!